Monday, May 12
when a GIRL is quiet ... millions of things are running in her mind.
when a GIRL is not arguing ... she is thinking deeply.
when a GIRL looks at u with eyes full of questions ... she is wondering how long you will be around.
when a GIRL answers " i'm fine " after a few seconds ... she is not at all fine.
when a GIRL stares at you ... she is wondering why you are lying.
when a GIRL lays on your chest ... she is wishing for you to be hers forever.
when a GIRL wants to see you everyday... she wants to be pampered.
when a GIRL says " I love you " ... she means it.
when a GIRL says " I miss you " ... no one in this world can miss you more than that.
life only comes around once make sure u spend it with the right person ....
find a guy ... who calls you beautiful instead of hot. who calls you back when you hang up on him. who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.
wait for the guy who ... kisses your forehead. who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats. who holds your hand in front of his friends. who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you. who turns to his friends and says, " That's her!! "
you used to be like that. and i was proud to have you. so vey proud indeed. i've found The guy. i did. but where is he now? why are you feeling insecure and not able to trust me enough that my feelings are not mere infatuations but i care about every single thing about you. couldn't you trust me enough to see the true intentions of this wait? couldn't you last and choose to believe that it pains me too that i can't be talking to you and want to come to you if only i can too? call me selfish like what you called p. call me unreasonable like what you used on z.
were you real? was the angel in my dreams never existent?
i''ll tell you what i want. but i know i'll never get it. so why ask right?
i want you to be here at perth with me.
i want you never to talk to zy again.
i want you to be truthful to me.
i want you to commit to what you say and not find excuses for the possibilities of not being able to last because it'll only allow you to find an easy way out when things gets tough.
and then i will ask you.. where is our ttatt.
you've broken the trust once.. is it too much to ask if i want you to show me that i mean so much to you that you'll not mind waiting years or months just to build that trust again?
why so impatient and angry? if it bothers you so much that i'm overseas and can't give myself to you during this period, then letting you go should be the best choice.
go find someone else who can satisfy you..
when a GIRL is not arguing ... she is thinking deeply.
when a GIRL looks at u with eyes full of questions ... she is wondering how long you will be around.
when a GIRL answers " i'm fine " after a few seconds ... she is not at all fine.
when a GIRL stares at you ... she is wondering why you are lying.
when a GIRL lays on your chest ... she is wishing for you to be hers forever.
when a GIRL wants to see you everyday... she wants to be pampered.
when a GIRL says " I love you " ... she means it.
when a GIRL says " I miss you " ... no one in this world can miss you more than that.
life only comes around once make sure u spend it with the right person ....
find a guy ... who calls you beautiful instead of hot. who calls you back when you hang up on him. who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.
wait for the guy who ... kisses your forehead. who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats. who holds your hand in front of his friends. who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you. who turns to his friends and says, " That's her!! "
you used to be like that. and i was proud to have you. so vey proud indeed. i've found The guy. i did. but where is he now? why are you feeling insecure and not able to trust me enough that my feelings are not mere infatuations but i care about every single thing about you. couldn't you trust me enough to see the true intentions of this wait? couldn't you last and choose to believe that it pains me too that i can't be talking to you and want to come to you if only i can too? call me selfish like what you called p. call me unreasonable like what you used on z.
were you real? was the angel in my dreams never existent?
i''ll tell you what i want. but i know i'll never get it. so why ask right?
i want you to be here at perth with me.
i want you never to talk to zy again.
i want you to be truthful to me.
i want you to commit to what you say and not find excuses for the possibilities of not being able to last because it'll only allow you to find an easy way out when things gets tough.
and then i will ask you.. where is our ttatt.
you've broken the trust once.. is it too much to ask if i want you to show me that i mean so much to you that you'll not mind waiting years or months just to build that trust again?
why so impatient and angry? if it bothers you so much that i'm overseas and can't give myself to you during this period, then letting you go should be the best choice.
go find someone else who can satisfy you..
22:33
Sunday, May 4
yes i'm moving again.. should i tell you?
am i allowed to?
damn this is -
am i allowed to?
damn this is -
23:25
i thought i should hide from you
i love you, still.
i miss you, still.
there is not one moment you've left my heart or my soul, or my mind.
i really hope not to have done this. but it's irreversible.
and i can't reply. no i really can't.
WHATTHEHELL. i miss you. damn badly.
i wanna save us from fighting again.
i want you to move on to a good life with someone you'll respect and adore.
you are there, i am here, you're not strong, i won't force you.
i want to save you from coming up with excuses if you had to.
i want to be the back guy who left you.
i want to be the one who gives up just cos the test of time is too hard for us.
she will be there for you
she always have
she still likes you
and you've always given her anything she wanted
she can always be there
will you care if i'm upset?
will it affect you anymore that i feel disappointed or hurt or dull too?
i wanna give you my all
and i know being generous is not about asking for something in return for something i did
but i wanna be pampered
and treasured
and loved too
LIKE I'M REALLY YOUR PRINCESS YOUR QUEEN
not her
i wanna be looked up to but not overpower you
just not be despised.
i feel so inferior
so stupid
so lousy
like i don't matter anymore,
do i matter?
you don't have to keep telling me you still like me
but at least don't treat me like a venting hole even if you are angry against me for leaving you behind
and now that you kept reiliterating about singapore uni, isn't that some sort of a hint?
i don't know about you too.
I WANNA KNOW TOO
but am i supposed to get angry at you too for being busy and not being able to answer my questions?
or when you forget or avoid my questions, am i supposed to get back at you and demand for a reasoning
like i don't trust you..
i'm really hurt that i seem to not deserve any trust from you..
in your eyes, am i really that minute that when i don't reply cos of so many reasons for US, you don't even care if something had happened to me but just concerned with how i don't care about your feelings and simply ignored you..
even when we're not together, i don't go look for some guy to be attached to or look out for eligible options.
but it seems like i'm such a bitch to you..
and for the record, i hate you cursing at me cos it cuts real deep each time.
stop hollering at me, or throwing your temper
it hurts me to a point i really want to cry in my heart it's unbearable.
i miss talking to you
i miss us being really close but we still considered each other's feelings and cared for one another
i miss us going out as though it's so special to only you and me
life cannot only be romantic, you'll see the dark side.
but the dark side only surfaces when you don't take the other party into consideration.. not?
and it's not like i always don't care about your finances
you having to keep reminding me you're broke and thus can't spend too much on my make me feel like you're not willing..
you don't have to tell but i'll still appreciate any and everythign you do for me.
and you told me you brought her to jack's place.
well i won't tell you it's my favourite dining place,
but the fact that with her, money never mattered, but on my you try to be thrifty.
i'm not asking you to spend large amount of money on me
did i ever? in the initial stages
i never had the intentions till the comparisons just made it so apparant to me that i'm losing so much of self-worth and dignity and i'm becoming so very invisible in your eyes...
sorry for the abrupt ending...
do you still love me?
<3
i love you, still.
i miss you, still.
there is not one moment you've left my heart or my soul, or my mind.
i really hope not to have done this. but it's irreversible.
and i can't reply. no i really can't.
WHATTHEHELL. i miss you. damn badly.
i wanna save us from fighting again.
i want you to move on to a good life with someone you'll respect and adore.
you are there, i am here, you're not strong, i won't force you.
i want to save you from coming up with excuses if you had to.
i want to be the back guy who left you.
i want to be the one who gives up just cos the test of time is too hard for us.
she will be there for you
she always have
she still likes you
and you've always given her anything she wanted
she can always be there
will you care if i'm upset?
will it affect you anymore that i feel disappointed or hurt or dull too?
i wanna give you my all
and i know being generous is not about asking for something in return for something i did
but i wanna be pampered
and treasured
and loved too
LIKE I'M REALLY YOUR PRINCESS YOUR QUEEN
not her
i wanna be looked up to but not overpower you
just not be despised.
i feel so inferior
so stupid
so lousy
like i don't matter anymore,
do i matter?
you don't have to keep telling me you still like me
but at least don't treat me like a venting hole even if you are angry against me for leaving you behind
and now that you kept reiliterating about singapore uni, isn't that some sort of a hint?
i don't know about you too.
I WANNA KNOW TOO
but am i supposed to get angry at you too for being busy and not being able to answer my questions?
or when you forget or avoid my questions, am i supposed to get back at you and demand for a reasoning
like i don't trust you..
i'm really hurt that i seem to not deserve any trust from you..
in your eyes, am i really that minute that when i don't reply cos of so many reasons for US, you don't even care if something had happened to me but just concerned with how i don't care about your feelings and simply ignored you..
even when we're not together, i don't go look for some guy to be attached to or look out for eligible options.
but it seems like i'm such a bitch to you..
and for the record, i hate you cursing at me cos it cuts real deep each time.
stop hollering at me, or throwing your temper
it hurts me to a point i really want to cry in my heart it's unbearable.
i miss talking to you
i miss us being really close but we still considered each other's feelings and cared for one another
i miss us going out as though it's so special to only you and me
life cannot only be romantic, you'll see the dark side.
but the dark side only surfaces when you don't take the other party into consideration.. not?
and it's not like i always don't care about your finances
you having to keep reminding me you're broke and thus can't spend too much on my make me feel like you're not willing..
you don't have to tell but i'll still appreciate any and everythign you do for me.
and you told me you brought her to jack's place.
well i won't tell you it's my favourite dining place,
but the fact that with her, money never mattered, but on my you try to be thrifty.
i'm not asking you to spend large amount of money on me
did i ever? in the initial stages
i never had the intentions till the comparisons just made it so apparant to me that i'm losing so much of self-worth and dignity and i'm becoming so very invisible in your eyes...
sorry for the abrupt ending...
do you still love me?
<3
Labels: to you
22:54